Riiiiiiice?

I'm currently trying to find a job, no luck yet. Which is lame. Heh, I might actually have to get up before noon and go out and try and find one (<I don't like how many "ands" I used there). Depression sucks btw. I'm feeling a bit better than I was just a month or so ago, but I still can't bring myself to do anything productive. I just need to focus, and do it (easier said than done am I right?). I want uber badly to start writing again, but I'm having a hard time getting inspired enough to do it. All my ideas are here in this weird cranium of mine, I just lack the motivation and the thought process to put it into word form. I flunked out of my first ever term of college, which is always a plus in life, but fuck it, I can't dwell on it now, I'll just go more crazy. I just have to say "Hey, I fucked up. Sorry." and try and learn and grow from it. My parents divorce is just getting plain annoying and stupid. I feel like I have to take a side, and that's bugging the shit out of me. My moms depression is terrible, and I pray (Yeah, I actually fucking PRAY) that she'll get better. But like every other time, nothing changes, or things just get worse. And honestly, I'm fucking tired of everything being shitty. So. Fucking. Tired. Blah. Anyways. I just needed to vent for a sec. And blogging sometimes helps. It's free, therapy is not.